Healing out loud

Because I nearly died in silence.

Expansion by Paige Bradley

I used to believe silence was strength.

That if I could just keep it together - no cracks, no tears - I’d win.

But all I won was loneliness. Exhaustion. And a darkness that nearly swallowed me whole.

Mental health struggles don’t always scream.

Sometimes, they whisper lies so quietly you start mistaking them for your own voice.

You smile when you're breaking.

You say "I'm fine" when you're coming apart.

You keep showing up, until you can’t.

I came so close to disappearing. And no one knew.

Not because they didn’t care.

But because I didn’t let them. Because I didn’t know how.

That’s the thing about struggling with your mental health - it doesn’t always look like what people expect. It isn’t always obvious. Sometimes it’s waking up and feeling like you’ve already failed before the day begins. It’s isolating yourself not because you want to be alone, but because you don’t know how to explain what’s happening inside. It’s putting on a brave face because you’re terrified that if you speak your truth, everything will unravel.

And if I’m honest, I didn’t really believe I deserved help.

I was unworthy of being a burden.

But surviving - that long, lonely survival - taught me something I’ll never forget:

Silence isn’t strength.

Silence is suffering.

So now, I choose to heal out loud.

Not because it’s easy.

Not because I have all the answers.

But because I know what it feels like to almost not make it.

And I refuse to keep pretending that pain has to be a secret.

Silence is not safety. And healing doesn't happen in hiding.

There is power in speaking the truth, even when your voice trembles.

There is healing in saying, I’m not okay, and letting someone hold space for you.

There is freedom in no longer pretending.

I speak, because someone else needs to know they’re not alone.

I write, because I wish I’d seen words like these when I was in the dark.

I live my truth, because I almost didn’t.

If you’re reading this and you’re in that dark place - I see you. I know how heavy it feels. And I need you to know: you are not weak. You are not broken. You are not alone.

You are worthy of support.

You are worthy of healing.

You are worthy of living.

I’m still learning. Still healing. Still figuring it out.

But I’m doing it out loud now.

Because maybe, just maybe, these words will reach someone else who’s been suffering in silence, and give them permission to speak too.

You don’t have to go through this alone.

You were never meant to.

You’re allowed to fall apart.

You're allowed to ask for help.

You're allowed to live - and to heal - out loud.

Healing out loud is like raising an anthem, a chorus that binds us all in its song. I hope this blog offers the - Imagine, We Are the Champions, Lean on Me, Eye of the Tiger - universal collective that transcends humanity and reminds us that we are part of something bigger. Together we create harmony!

Start with this... Things I Never Said To Myself by Duduzile Noeleen Ngwenya

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