You Don't Have to Be Fixed to Be Finished

This isn’t the end of healing. It’s just the end of explaining it.

When I first started this blog, I was cracked wide open. Lost, confused, raw. Writing was my lifeline, my processing tool, my confessional booth. Every post was another attempt to understand myself, sometimes in real time.

Now, years later, I still don’t have it all figured out. But something has shifted.

I no longer feel like I need to explain my pain to make it valid. I no longer feel like I owe the world a detailed report of my recovery in order to deserve peace. I no longer identify as “broken,” even if I’m not entirely whole.

And that’s the rub. Healing doesn’t come with a certificate of completion. There’s no badge, no final exam, no congratulatory email from the universe saying, “You did it. You’re now a perfect human with no triggers.”

Instead, there’s a quiet realization: I can move forward as is.

I can still have fears. Still spiral occasionally. Still crave the things that used to numb me. Still overthink texts and cry when I think of the pain I caused my daughters. I can still be unfinished and still be okay.

Because the goal was never perfection. The goal was liberation. The freedom to live without constantly being hijacked by my pain. The freedom to show up in my life without shrinking or performing or self-destructing.

So no, I’m not “fixed.” But I’m also not stuck. I’m not apologizing for who I used to be, and I’m not waiting to be someone else before I start living.

Maybe this is what closure really looks like. Not a tidy bow, but a hand raised in quiet defiance saying, “I’m still here.”

And maybe that’s enough.

Please check out the next chapter of my journey, a new blog called Mentally Stable-ish™. It tells the hard truths and hilarity of hormones and hot flashes with humor and honesty. A sweaty and sarcastic, survival guide to menopause, motherhood and midlife mayhem in the modern era.

I'd love to hear from you! Please leave any questions, comments, or insights in the comments section below.