Two Wolves

A Cherokee lore about inner conflict

The Cherokee legend of Two Wolves is the tale of a grandfather imparting wisdom to his grandson about the battle between two wolves within one’s self, as a metaphor for inner conflict.  The elder explains that we all have two wolves inside of us.  A dark wolf, that is evil, full of anger and hatred.  And a light wolf, that is good, kind and true.  They fight all the time.  The fight between the wolves is eternal.  Both will always be there. Which one will win?

If you feed them right, they both win.

The dark wolf is a metaphor for the hardships and challenges of life.  It is our inner critic and our pride.  By cutting off the food supply, you are making a conscious choice to use your energy and resources on the thoughts, feelings and emotions that serve you in healthy ways.  While you can recognize the negative emotions occurring inside of you, you don’t have to attach to them or continue to give them attention.  Shifting your focus signals to the wolf that you acknowledge their presence, but will not nourish their growth.  Over time the wolf loses strength and power, but it never goes away.  Likewise, unhelpful thoughts and emotions will eventually lessen if we focus our efforts on feeding our most productive and helpful mindset.

The light wolf is a metaphor for the joyful facets of life.  It is our nurturing and compassionate self.  But it needs the dark wolf by its side for strength, agility, and strategy.  If we feed only the light wolf, we remain weak and vulnerable.  We can acknowledge the dark wolf and keep it happy, so that he isn’t attacking the light wolf, for which the light wolf is happy, and in that way, they both win.  Feeding only one starves the other, making them both uncontrollable.  While feeding each with acknowledgement and understanding removes the internal struggle for attention, so that we all win.

The lore reminds us that we cannot get rid of the dark wolf, it will always be there.  This applies to our emotions, behaviors, habits, and every other aspect of our lives.  Many people attempt to banish negative thoughts, feelings and emotions.  But a purely blissful life is fallacious and fictitious.  All that we can do is to act in spite of those negative feelings and hardships.  Taking the fears, worries, doubts and moving forward anyway, acknowledging each wolf for the benefits of their character.  The dark wolf has fearlessness, tenacity and courage, attributes that we all need from time to time.  The light wolf has compassion, hope and benevolence, attributes the world needs more of.

By practicing the 4 pillars of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), namely:

·       Mindfulness: self-awareness

·       Emotional Regulation: self-care

·       Distress Tolerance: self-love

·       Interpersonal Effectiveness: self-respect

We can implement evidence-based therapy that enables people with mental health conditions that involve difficulty regulating emotion (e.g.: substance use disorders, major depressive disorder, eating disorder, borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, among others) to learn and use skills and strategies that help us to understand and acknowledge the two wolves within.

I hope you will join me in delving deeper into the DBT pillars and the life changing benefits they can offer for the struggles of inner conflict.  If we nourish them correctly, we all win!  Sign up for my newsletter to get more content like this delivered straight to your inbox! Subscribe

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